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Archive for December, 2007

… visiting relatives

Visited my dads uncle’s house yesterday, young guy. Married with 4-5 kids. Panjsheri. I didn’t want to go, but was left with no choice. It was a funny encounter. His little son recognized my dad the second we got out of the car and immediately came and greeted us. I stood behind mum and dad while they continued with the formalities. He invited us in, leading the way to their house. The moment mum, dad and i entered the gates, a rock hurled past us, just missing the little boy who giggled hysterically. Dad stepped back. I was shocked. ‘besyaar mebakhsheen’. It was dad’s uncles mother in law, she was deeply embarrassed. I grinned. What a grandmother! My parents tried to do whatever they could to settle the old woman’s embarrassment. The little boy broke into fits of laughter when he realized what had happened.

Unbeknown to us, the little boy had disobeyed his grandma. She was boiling with rage inside and had sworn to make sure he was hit with three rocks. So basically, being a woman, she could not leave the gates and run after him on the street (where the little boy had ran to play with the others and return home once his grandma’s anger had subsided). Grandma hid behind a wall, waiting for her grandson to enter. His grandma had no idea we were also walking in with him, so she decided to take sweet revenge- aiming the rock at the boy. Only to be mortified.

Immediately, I knew this would be no ordinary visit. They welcomed us into their humble home, into a tiny, warm living room.

A few minutes later, the grandma joined us. She was a nice lady with a thick Panjsheri accent. She apologized for her blunder earlier on and continuted about how children nowadays have grown to be cheshm safeed. And adults retaliate with rocks.

I didn’t know what the purpose of the visit was. They brought tea, i listened to the old lady’s conversation. They usually talk about two things, 1) sad stories that happened 10 years ago, 2) how sick they are.

Soon enough it was time to go home sweet home. or as my sister mistook it the other night, ‘sweet home sweet’. 😀

ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar.

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I get asked how i dress in Kabul. Well most Afgs from abroad and most western women who currently live in Kabul wear the embroidered shirts over trousers or jeans. They’re great coz they come mid-thigh, they’re loose and they don’t attract men’s attention.

I own over 20 of em and they’re so convenient. They’re my best friends in Kabul 🙂

Also, just found out i finish work at 2.30pm today and have tomorrow off. So i shall post my new years resolution on January 2nd bakhayr.

In the mean time, i wish you all a very safe and happy New Years :d

Ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar.

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I’m very much against culture when it opposes religion because it promises failure, it’s proof in our cultures! Sorry to say, but most of our afghans in ‘kharij’ (western countries) have lost themselves.

Examples- drinking ‘moderately’ thinking it’s okay! Not praying because only dehati (a term used to describe the backward) ppl do that, or looking down at girls who wear hijab.

They also consider themselves raseeda (advanced)  if they adapt to the western way of life and sense of dressing, but when they open their mouth… they talk like they haven’t completed 10th grade.

Culture is backward and pagan! Islam liberated nations from pagan rituals, culture literally imposes sanctions. For example; in Afg culture- when a girl gets married, she has to have a massive wedding because they have this theory that the more the groom spends, the more he’ll love her. Instead, what implications does this cause? Financial burden for the newly wed couple. Materialism!

Other examples: 

Culture- boys do what they like- club, drink, pre marital sex.. it’s all okay! bacha ast. but for girls, they have to be home by 6pm… sexism, inequality!
Islam- demands equality.

Culture- arranged marriages, you have to marry who your parents chose.
Islam- the girl has the ultimate say and final decision.

Culture- divorce is completely WRONG (especially in Pashton culture). So you live the rest of your life abused by your husband

Islam- Use divorce BUT as your last resort!

Why do u think the world is the way it is? Because gov’ts have substituted religion with secular, man-made systems with so many flaws. Democracy exists in Islamic political/legal systems (and i’m not referring to the Islamic systems we have in the present day Muslim countries). Look at the teachings, not the people. The Ottoman Empire was a system of perfection.

Now for the practical side of things…

Picture this: Your family is a culture loving family and considers culture as ‘Islamic’. So you guys move to ‘Kharij’ a western country. You’re fed up with the cultural issues which don’t make sense, so you rebel, going against it. You replace your parent’s culture with your own culture, the kharijee way… the ‘wrong’ way. Your parents disapprove, and so does the community. 

So, what happened to Islam in the picture?

It was never there, so you’ve lost urself. The only understanding of Islam you have is the Islam your parents fed you.

Culture can not be integrated into the western society because the values clash. Islam can be integrated quite simply. It’s a simple religion as God tells us in the Quran;-

‘This day have I perfected your religion for you,Completed my favor upon u, And have chosen for you Islam as your religion, (Al-Maida 5:3)

So, who are we to judge Islam as ‘backward’? And attempting to modify it!

I am all for Islam!

My advice to the youth of today: Learn Islam for yourself! Research. Analyse. Debate. Most importantly- QUESTION! Don’t expect your parents to hand over Islam to you on a plate, they’re only human and bound to make mistakes.

 Don’t preach with your mouth, preach by your actions- PRACTISE!

Finally, don’t follow what ppl do or say, find out for yourself. The perfect being, Prophet Moh’d left us with two things- The Hadith (his examples) and Quran.

Most ppl think being ‘afghan’ is being ‘muslim’. this where the confusion lies!

Afghans think that culture = religion.

In actual fact;

afghan= culture
muslim= religion

I rest my case!

Everyone is entitled to his/her own opinion and this is mine.

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Cultural attire

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Girl power!

smirk @ ‘Girl Power’ hehe

Emancipation of Afg women granted to battle against domestic violence. How? Meeting rising concerns over domestic violence against women, a women’s bodybuilding club has been launched in Afghanistan.

 Ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar

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A leader lost, a courageous fighter down, the world is one less of an intelligent woman. While I consider Benazir Bhutto an extremely intelligent and courageous woman, I found it rather amusing to learn about her death :

Bhutto was gunned down as she waved to supporters from the sunroof of her armored car following a rally in Rawalpindi, a city of 1.5 million.

Okay, what is the point of riding in an armoured vehicle if you are going to stick your head out of the sunroof in a rally amongst hundreds and thousands of people? And lets say if Bhutto had sought shelter and made actual use of her armoured vehicle, which silly suicide bomber would target an armoured vehicle?

Beats me!

 Also, Mansoor Dadullah has been dismissed by Mullah Omar but is refusing to step down. He’s asking for a bullet in his head. but then again, he might be killed either way…

 Sad, sad world! It’s so upsetting!

 Ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar!

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Itty bitty favourites

beautiful.jpg Ethnic beauty, So sultry!

el.jpg boys will be boys!

zar.jpg Afghan girls, flying higher than the mountains?

lilgrlkc1.png 

helga1.jpg oh my god, who remembers Helga?? ‘Hey Arnold, Hey football head!’

arabjew.jpg

If only… It would be a perfect world!

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Doctors at a hospital in Qalat, capital of Zabul Province in southern Afghanistan, are treating a brutally tortured woman whose husband cut off both her ears and nose, broke her teeth and shaved her head only three months after their marriage. The victim, 16-year-old Nazia, is also suffering from psychiatric distress due to her experience, according to a doctor in Qalat hospital.

From her bed in Qalat hospital Nazia told IRIN her story:

“My family wedded me to Mumtaz [a 40-year-old man] some three months ago, in Pakistan. Soon after our marriage we moved to his house in Qalat where his relatives told me he had another wife who had died a year ago. In Qalat my husband was jobless and was always complaining about economic problems. Two weeks after we moved to our new home he beat me for no obvious reason.

“One day I asked him to let me go to a party at my in-laws. He agreed and said I should return home in the afternoon. That day, although I came home early, I found him very angry. He beat me again, worse than the first time, and warned that he would kill me if I stepped outside the home again. He also told his brother and nephews not to come to our house in his absence.

“Day-after-day Mumtaz’s suspicion increased. He was thinking other men were visiting me while he was not at home. He did not listen to my pleas and was always saying that all women are bad and unfaithful to men. During this time he often beat me with a stick.

“One night he hit me so much that I fainted. When I regained consciousness I found my head had been shaved. I cried so much, but he did not care.

“One week later he knocked me down, bound my hands, and then broke my teeth with a stone. He also poured boiling water on my feet. After this I could not walk and was in a lot of pain, but he said I was only pretending.

“No one was coming to our house so I could not tell anyone about my situation. I had nowhere else to go either. My family lives in Pakistan.

“One night I could not cook dinner for him because I could not stand on my feet. He got so upset when he found that there was nothing for him to eat. He started beating me. Again, he bound my hands with a piece of cloth. I felt a terrible pain in my left ear and then blood was flowing down my face. I thought that he wanted to kill me so I started screaming. Then I felt a similar pain in my right ear and more blood.

“I tasted a mixture of blood and tears in my mouth while my voice was fading. I felt the worst pain in my life only a few seconds later when my husband used his knife to cut off my nose. I fainted.

“Now I do not know where my husband has gone.”

(Source: IRIN, Qalat, 26/12/07)

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You don’t wanna know! Kala paachah (head and lower part of the leg) of a sheep. H is coming over for dinner, so it’s considered a ‘lavish’ dinner. I would take photos, but since it has gone for a ‘walk’. I can’t! I found one online though.

It disturbs my stomach everytime i lay eyes on it. Sickening!

SM is getting married tomorrow! Congrats, sweety!
Nazaneen, thanks for the comments. Yes, i reckon you should start your blog and make sure to give me the link 🙂

Ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar.

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For my muhajebabes*

*muhajiba- a woman who wears hijab, head veil.

Check out this site, it’s hijab styles! DO NOT, i repeat, DO NOT follow the clothing sense, it’s appalling. Just the way the scarf is done looks neat and sleek.

The site is in Arabic but the pictures are self explanatory. For all my girls who wear the hijab, make it look classy and chic! Just coz u wear hijab, dont mean u gotta look nasty! Unfortunately, most ignorant (yes, ignorant) afghans consider the hiijab ‘dehati’ (village like) and look down at girls who do wear it.

Wear the hijab and walk it with pride!

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