Archive for the ‘Afg tradition’ Category

A rich man 60 years of age visits his country (Afghanistan, Pakistan, Arab world etc.)  from abroad and weds a 16 year old girl?!?!?!

It’s becoming a trend in the so-called ”Islamic” Republic of Afghanistan, the Arab world and other South East Asian countries. It’s disgusting! The  worst part is that the world mistakenly believes it as being an Islamic act because oh, the Prophet (PBUH*) did it!

ENOUGH!! Enough of defaming Islam for their own desires! Extremism, sexism, mistreating their women, raping non-muslim women because it’s ”allowed” WHERE DOES THAT SAY IN ANY PART OF ISLAM? Islam is a great religion with many rights and liberation. Enough of destructing the religion!

I’m going to focus on one part, marrying more then one wife!

To those who believe that more than one wife is alright, because the Prophet* did. Well, guess what? The Prophet (PBUH*) also gave charity, fed the poor, visited the sick, was good to his wife, be faithful and loyal to your wife, believed in justice and not in the killings of civilians, he was a man of good thoughts and actions, he fought evil with good and the list goes on. Why won’t you follow those doings????

I’m appalled at men/women who choose what they like and leave out what they like and call themselves ‘a good Muslim’.

As for the multi-wife issue. Here’s my argument:

Permission to practice polygamy is not associated  with mere satisfaction of passion.  It is rather associated with compassion toward widows and  orphans. It was the Quran that limited and put conditions on the practice of polygamy among the  Arabs, who had as many as ten or more wives and considered them “property”. ^

And if you be apprehensive that you will not be able to do justice to the orphans, you may marry two or three or four women whom you choose. But if you apprehend that you might not be able to do justice to them, then marry only one wife. (Maududi, The Meaning of the Qur’an, vol. 1, p. 305)

The key clauses are “you will not be able to do justice to the orphans” and “you may marry two or three or four women whom you choose.” Maududi (d. 1979) is a respected traditional and conservative commentator on the Quran. So we should let him explain what they mean. He says that the clauses accomplished the following:

In pre-Islamic days men used to marry a limitless number of women and grab the property of their orphan nephews and nieces to support their wives.

In pre-Islamic days, men could marry as many women as they wanted and “treat them cruelly and unjustly” with impunity. So the Quran limits the number to four, and only if the man could keep care of them all: “But if you apprehend that you might not be able to do justice to them.”

Surah Nisa verse 129 says: ‘It is very difficult to be just and fair between women’. [Al-Qur’an (4:129)]


 Dr Zakir Naik has elaborated on this topic, of why Polygamy is allowed and it’s conditions. He concludes by saying,  it is mainly to protect the modesty of women.   

Unfortunately, men in our society today carry this act for their own pleasure and selfishness, not compassion. Further, I believe society today has created other alternatives of helping the orphans and the widows instead of marrying them and causing an unhappy family home where the first wife disagrees (come on, who would wanna share a man or a father???)

In today’s world, very few men would do this out of compassion. Maybe one in a million would turn out to do it out of compassion.

Look for yourself, the men who have more than one wife- were any of them orphans at the time of marriage? On the verge of becoming public property? No and no!

Case dismissed.

You might think otherwise, but Allah knows best.

* Peace be upon him.

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I’m back!

Back from my wedding shopping trip to Dubai and Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. It felt so good getting out of here, i feel revived and energised.

So, how was the trip? Great! I went with my other half, did a lot of shopping, sightseeing, relaxed on the beach, shopping, shopping and more shopping. Malaysia has always been one of my favourite places.

We bought a diamond engagement ring; a brilliant round cut, F clarity, Half a carat, on white gold, GIA certified. to be precise. It’s absolutely stunning!

Wedding dress- Off white, very ‘un-afghan’ and simple. No beaded embroidery. I love it! We got it from Dubai, a London based shop.

Veil- Cathedral length, just as good as the dress.

Bands- White gold, plain, around 5 mm wide.

I bought lots of shoes, watches, a new phone (Nokia, of course!) scarves, handbags etc.

Dubai was alright, not as good as i expected! There aren’t any historical sites or culture, it gave off a cold look. It’s just too new. and the shopping isn’t all that. Malaysia is better!

Malaysia, a beauty as always!

Will post pics soon. Have a lot of office work to deal with right now. Wedding is less than a month away, half way there.

Oh and afg new years, my in laws came to Afghanistan with pressies. It’s tradition that they bring the bride a few pairs of clothes, jewelry, fish and jelabee. The brides family buys presents for each member of the family that comes on that day so tthat they don’t leave empty handed.

So much to plan for the wedding… and so much office-work. So you’ll know why i’m lazy when it comes to posting.

As for Kabul airport, it’s still a joke! We flew KamAir Airlines (supposedly one of the ‘best’) to Dubai and then with Emirates to KL, Malaysia. I thought KamAir would drop any moment! Wasn’t so bad, wasn’t good either. Food sucked! No TVs either.

The luggage screening was a bigger joke. The uniformed guard sat with his legs crossed looking (staring, rather) at passer bys. Totally ignoring the screen, he probably missed a few prohibited items in the process. Ppl kept loading their bags one on top of the other (instead of putting it besides each other) for it to be screened. I watched on. Some luggages rope tied, others Glad-wrapped in plastic. They weren’t suitcases, most local passengers had their load in huge bed sheets.

It was then my phone rang… shocking news…

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Merry Xmas everyone!

Wanna know how i celebrated mine? two words- Stuffy and heated.

Yesterday, i made the ultimate grave mistake of going to the ‘hamaam’. Forgetting the one time it struck me ill, i decided to go again with mum and my little sisters.

Basically, it’s a big tiled bathroom with benches along the walls, two huge taps- one cold water, the other hot water. You enter, there are women collecting an entry fee of 20 Afs (~50c AU). To your left, there’s a passage where a lady sits and watches over your clothes and items as you go in to bathe (nope, no key-lockers).

I entered the actual bathroom, stuffy and sometimes crowded. A gush of humid air hit my face as i tried making my way through the naked women who were fiercely scrubbing themselves. Some were modest, wearing an underwear *sarcasm*. Most were perfomring the ultimate hamaam ritual of keesa . Using a rough loofa, they scrub til the dead skin cells are rolled off and gone. An extreme form of exfoliation.

Basically, Kabul is very dusty. In order to maintain hygiene, you MUST go to the hamaam and do the whole keesa thing otherwise, you’d be walking around looking like you just cleaned a chimney- Oliver Twist!

I would agree that it does cleanse but on that note, it also leaves you with unpleasant rashes if your not used to it. So be gentle the first time!

We spent over 2 hours in there, i felt like i still wasn’t clean as the place wasn’t hygienic and so gave up and took another shower when returning home.

Upon returning home, everyone had things to do and so left the house. it was my two little sisters and the maid. Lunch time arrived. I offered my sisters by ordering AFC (equivalent to KFC). Eventually, we agreed to go and buy junk food, then go to Cedars (a Lebanese/ Italian restaurant). Boy, were they happy!

And so we did, my lovely fiance- H joined us at Cedars, but as he already had lunch, he joined us for coffee. We chatted for a little while before leaving for Shar e Naw where he bought a cake and some pastries (afg tradition for fiance’s to bring their fiancee’s sweets or fresh/ dried fruits when visiting her).

This morning on my way to work, Kabul weather was surprisingly clear! The mountains made a sharp contrast against the sky, other days it would blend in the smog and the clouds. Too bad my camera charger has been stolen, i wasn’t able to photograph it.

Further, tomorrow night mum is cooking Kala Palaw (sheeps head cooked in rice) and i can’t believe H likes that.

The thought of it makes me feel sick.

Two things i’m presently contemplating;

1- Where to go early March for a holiday. Europe is too cold, Turkey/ Greece is also too cold, The States is also freezing. Australia has excellent weather at that time. We have to book tickets soon.

2- Moving my blog to wordpress. why? because it has better features!

It’s cold, my hands are freezing. Must do some work!

ba omideh deedaar, khuda negahdaar

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Snow culture in Afg

Barf Mebarad Ba Farmani Khuda
Barf naw az ma, barfee az shuma!

I got the above email from a colleague and i replied back saying ‘what does this mean?’ He came to my office and explained the whole thing! Basically, what happens is that one the first day of snow, one person congratulates another on the arrival of snow. When this happens, they recite the above verse, following this; the congratulator has to invite the person who has recited the verse for dinner or lunch.

I know, confusing! I had to get my colleague to explain it to me twice.

Anyways, IT SNOWED TODAY! I saw the snow flakes!!

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